Transcribed by: Hawa Kante

Zoe: Hello and welcome to the latest installment of Lemon OG, today I'm here with my besties London and Bethany and we'll be talking about aliens. I'm super excited and I feel like it's just gonna be a very fun time. What is everyone smoking today?

Bethany: I'm smoking a Cali bomb into pre rolls whole gram. It's pretty nice!

London: Got even it was like five bucks. Okay mood so I'm smoking a pen today so I have this card as a sour diesel sativa so that's fun it's almost gone, but she has been good to me. And yeah I dig it.

Zoe: I dig it. I moved to California and I have yet to enter a Weed Shop. My God every corner every single fucking corner when you're.

London: You're failing the limit oh gee and then you're failing because you're literally the rest of us.

Zoe: I know. You know?

London:For that all we hear about is how good California is. And you have access to it.

Zoe: My thing though, is that a really long time ago, I found this amazing tasting vape and it was so good. It was fucking macaroon flavored and it was delicious. And it was hot pink. It had a little heart in the bottom. It was so cute. And I've been trying to find it and I think that they went out of stock and I just can't bring myself to go buy like my usual one that I would get in Iowa. And so I've just been like, I've been waiting for something to just fall into my hands for me to be like that is really cool. And I like that so yeah, I'll take it I'll take the fucking heat I've been stupid.

Bethany: What you do, darlin. You find all the dispensaries around you with the best first time patient things sometimes they give you free shit. I went to one that gave me 40% off my freaking order and you do all of those deals and you buy something really cheap the first time until you find a dispensary that you like noted and makes them give you all those freebies and discounts and shit because almost all of them have a first time patient discount noted.

Zoe:Okay, fallen because I have like and this is even more embarrassing. I have like at least three dispensaries within walking distance of me. I literally have no f@!@#$ reason to be like, be ashamed. I'm definitely like that, I know. Yep. I f$#@ up. No. So I am just free balling it today. Well, we're talking about aliens. So Do y'all believe in aliens?

Bethany: F@#!%@! yes. Yeah. Oh my gosh. Heard. Yes. Okay, so like, I'd like to clarify what I mean by aliens, though. Like, if you're asking me do I think like little green men in a spaceship come down to earth to fuck with people and like probe their buttholes I'm gonna be like, No, but if you're asking me do you think somewhere in the literally endless mindblowingly like big universe, somebody might have some sort of life on it. I don't even need it to be remotely human life. Like they have a different planet. They'll have to have adapted to different conditions. You know, you're telling me like nowhere in literal endlessness. There's nothing like feeling statistically improbable.

London: I felt like I believed in aliens. And I also wouldn't be shocked if, like, little green people came in and poked their butt holes because at this point, anything's possible. That sounds kind of hard to know. i Yeah. I definitely think it's just I think it's just like there's definitely has to be other life forms has to like, come on. I think we people can't be that selfish and self absorbed to think that

Bethany: yeah, like the universe revolves around

London:with life, like we were the first to do it. Like, come on out.

Zoe: Yeah, agreed. I don't know the fact that we think of human life as the ultimate form of life. That's it. Like that's the only way that we can conceptualize that I feel like really hinders our ability to look at other planets and think about the fact that other things could be living there when our only view of consciousness is our own. Does that make sense?

Bethany: Yeah, like there could be some like single celled amoeba out there. That's a fucking alien. Like, you know, it's alive. It's all time.

London:Yeah, yeah. And you know what, there is a large chance that people already know that aliens exist, AKA. 

Bethany: If anyone knows, the government knows, like, if you like, I'm not a conspiracy theorist by any means. But if the government was like, Yeah, aliens have been real the whole time. I'd be like, Yeah, okay, that follows. Yeah. I believe that.

London: I agree. Like I'm not super into but I'm like, there's definitely sketchy shit going on.

Bethany: That's like how I feel about 911. Like, do I see? Yeah. No, not really. But if I found out that he did, would I be surprised? No, definitely. 

London: Like, it's possible maybe he did. We don't know. The thing is, as far as being an American citizen, there's just like a level of like, we don't know what the fuck is going on. And you know what? You gotta be okay with that.

Bethany: We have a natural mistrust of the government. Well, unless you like some fucking bootleg or whatever. 

Zoe: So like half the country. 

Bethany: Yeah. But I feel like even they expect that the government's lying to them about stuff. They just blame the LIBS instead, you know? But like, I feel like everybody in America thinks the government's like hiding a bunch of shit. Maybe that maybe it's a global thing? I don't know. Maybe that's an international field that really got to be a global claim and probably lies to me a lot. Hmm.

London:Yeah, I was just thinking because other places have certain things restricted so it's like shits probably restricted to us. And it's like, we can only exist wherever they tell you you have access to so it's like shit. 

Zoe: Yeah,I feel like even with the International Space Station's like, yeah, sure, space is cool, whatever, whatever. But it's like you're not curious about finding like what else is in space?

Bethany: I'm pretty sure NASA has done stuff. We have tried to make contact. We do like radio signals every once in a while and we get shipped back every now and then that just fascinates me like how you would have to consider communicating with a species that like you have no idea what sort of like technology development they have, what languages they speak, if they speak languages, the way that we even do I can't imagine like I imagine reaching out to aliens is probably difficult. I think it'd be sick as fuck if we could like I would prefer we didn't die out as a species before we found other life but you know, I think it's a good possibility. Space is vast. Like what is the next like, planet with life on it's like 10 solar systems over you know

Zoe:I am an avid believer that we have already made contact and I say that primarily I've nothing to back this up. There's no sure way to back this up. My thoughts. Why the fuck do they have Roswell locked down the way that they do? That's my initial thought. And to who the fuck decided that like little gray dudes with big ol eyes were like that was it actually,

Bethany: I read an article about that. About a particular couple that got captured by aliens. Like they were the first like famous people and their experience kind of bled out into other people's.So there's this article on history.com in particular where I am about Betty and Barney Hill. So these were two people in the 60s that allegedly got abducted by aliens, kinda like your standard Alien Abduction story, like they're driving around at night. Like they're by themselves with no car for miles. It's 1961 When suddenly they see a strange light in the sky that follows them which feels pretty classic for most alien abduction movies. And then when they finally got home, they suddenly felt really dirty and their watches had stopped working. His shoes were all stuffed and her dress had gotten ripped and they lost like two hours of time. So, with the help of a psychiatrist, the quiet couple eventually revealed a startling story gray beings with large eyes had walked into a metallic disk as white as her house was long that he said once inside the beings examined to the couple and a race to their memory, their experience kicked off an Air Force inquiry part of the secret Initiative Project Blue Book that investigated UFO sightings across the country. The incident would also become the first ever widely publicized alien abduction account and shape how stories like it we're told and understood from then on. So after this, pretty much everyone's alien abduction story turns into this same story. And a lot of psychologists had different reasons. They weren't like the type of people that would lie about this sort of thing. They had reputations, and people thought positive things about them. And all of a sudden, they were saying they got abducted by aliens, but they were a biracial couple in the 60s. And people thought the trauma of being other like that induced with like other XYZ factors, but that kind of feels like a stretch. I don't know, like a stretch to have aliens.

Zoe: That's really interesting. That was why I'm an avid believer that like, we probably have made contact with aliens. But also I think of the government approach to anything like that is that you just simply don't say anything. Their main reaction is going to be like, let's tell the public that these people straight up got dumped in by aliens. That'll calm people down.

Bethany: Oh, yeah. Like they totally be like, let's tell everybody to shut the fuck up about it. Like maybe if we'd made contacts, they'd tell us the aliens coming and picking us up would not be something to tell the public I think.

London: I've made them wouldn't tell us anyway. Like, I feel like they tried to cover it up anyway. I don't know. Also, that story is kind of crazy because I feel like how the fuck do you like go through something like that

Bethany:And like a process that I have an answer for actually.

Zoe: Oh, Who was the answer?

Bethany: After they returned home that he started having really disturbing dreams and Barney developed such bad anxiety he started getting authors. And so they went and sought out like a psychiatrist right and they were treated with hypnosis which was considered a mainstream technique at the time. It's also really good for treating trauma. I've heard through months of weekly sessions, their psychologist helped the couple piece together what they think could happen. So what they claimed happened was a vessel had landed on top of their car and put them to sleep. Afterwards, gray beings walked them up a long ramp and into the spacecraft. Once inside the hills were separated, taking turns and then an examination room that had curved walls, and a large light hanging from the ceiling. Each was asked to climb up on a metal table. The table was super short, so I guess their legs hung over the side. During the examinations the beings removed their clothes, plucked strands of their hair and took clippings of their nails and scraped their scale.

Zoe:Damn, they were straight up DNA collecting.

Bethany: Each sample was placed on a clear material not unlike a glass slide. Needles connected to long wires probe their head, arms, legs and spines. One large needle around four to six inches long was inserted into Betty's belly. These pregnancy tests supposedly left her twisting and pain throughout a beam Barney and Betty called the leader watched from the sign tense. Oh, apparently the aliens were confused when they discovered that her husband's teeth could be removed and I guess the wife tried to explain what dentures were. But they didn't get it.

London: Okay, I thought you meant the aliens were ripping out their teeth.

Bethany: No, sorry that's how it was written. I'm just reading it off. But like this, that's how they wrote it. Sorry. But he had dentures and they were like freaking out that his teeth were removable, supposedly.

Zoe: Okay, but that's the thing though. Is that like, if you were not obsessed with earthly beauty you don't? Like yeah, but it's like that makes sense to like, if you don't, you know, 

if you're like teeth or fucking whatever, like, you're not gonna create fake teeth. Like purely for the aesthetic reason of it, like warm, you know, you're just

Bethany: Have problems with your teeth falling out. Like maybe that's like, that's true. 

Bethany: What happened to them?

Zoe:  At our shit dental care throughout the world.

London:Maybe they don't need their teeth to like to eat. I don't know.

Zoe: Do they even have teeth?

Bethany:Like there's so many questions here.

Zoe: I just think of it like a fish. Have you ever seen that fish with teeth? No. I'm just thinking like little alien mouths like opening up and just having like a little set of chompers like a little teeny.

Bethany:So Betty asked one of the aliens where they were. And she mentioned not knowing a lot about the universe. And the alien said to her if you don't know where you are, then there wouldn't be any point in telling you where I am. But later under hypnosis, she was able to draw the Starmap shown to her. And then it was an important detail here that I think might have been what made them a target is that her husband had an IQ of 140. So he was like a genius. So it was really weird for him to like, all of a sudden be acting kooky like this.

London: Definitely saw some fucking aliens. But um, when did you say this happened? Bethany?

Bethany: This was a 1961

Bethany:That's okay,I thought it's interesting, because I feel like a lot of popular media I've seen like aliens takes place in the 60s. Like I don't know. 

Bethany: So there are straight up movies based off of them. And Hollywood does base a lot of UFO abductions off of their story. Okay. But yeah, I think this article even straight up says that it influenced Hollywood. It makes sense. So the psychiatrists never felt like they were lying. So he always felt like they were telling the truth. But he concluded that Betty had dreamed the abduction and Barney had absorbed her story, essentially, since many of the most vivid details match descriptions of dreams, but he had jotted down after the event. And then he was quoted saying, I believe implicitly in the honesty of these people, so he went down fighting like, No, I think these people are telling the truth. He just thought that they were having false memories. He thought he was sleep paralysis and stuff. Really?

Zoe: I think it's also really interesting. So what month did it happen? Do you know? It says, okay, 1961. Okay. Yeah, that's right. That's right. So we set the first human to space in April of 61. We didn't go walk in the moon until like, later and 69 I, you know, like, if I was an alien, and like, I had this whole vast space to myself, and then there was just some fucking like, person thing showing up and like a metal can essentially in my space, I'd want to go check it out. Like where do you come from, you know, like, it's just really interesting timing. What the fuck are you? Does that make sense?

London:Yeah, yeah. Like maybe someone saw us I get that

Zoe: Sputnik was launched into space on October 4 1957.

London: And that was 61.

Zoe:  Yeah. So you know, like if you're traveling light years, and if you have a, like a particularly speedy object that you're flying, I feel like that's not as crazy of a timeline. Like, if you're like, chillin, you know, and you can see you, obviously have significantly better technology than we do. And you're just like, what is that metal that can fly around? Oh my god, there's a dog in it. Oh, my God. And then, you know, there's another metal cam that floats up to space and it's got a whole human in it. You know, it's like, one would assume you'd probably go investigate and like these poor people just got sucked. 

Bethany: Oh my gosh, I found the quote about it being because they were a biracial couple. Who so they claimed you have a bi racial couple at a time where obviously it's not easy to be a bi racial couple. Look at what those aliens were: a mixture of black and white. And I find that very meaningful, because they were great aliens. Why? The guy was saying that it was like.

Zoe:This man probably thought he was saying something so fucking.

London: it's a mixture of both of them, know? That doesn't really connect though. Like, I feel like they're trying to find a way.

Zoe: That makes me think of two . Is that the only case that has been? You know, reported? Because it's like, you know, if you're a person who likes damn, just got abducted, like is your first move to like, go straight to the police mine when I don't know where I would go? 

London: I definitely wouldn't go to the government like I would know. I keep that shit to myself.

Bethany: I worry if they believe you too much. They'd lock you up and do experiments on you.

Zoe: literally, or you know how long until I simply disappear? And then my ass is in you know, area 51 And I can't leave because I'm just stuck fucking military base at that. Absolutely not.

London: They like fucking shoot you on site? Because they're like, Oh, you shouldn't have seen, that's what I think they would do honestly. So I don't know why it was executedYeah. Like, I feel like if, and you know what? Nevermind. I was gonna say if they thought it was real. They might have, you know, done that. But I felt like they just think that people won't believe them anyway, so they're like, whatever. Like, even if it is.

Zoe: That's true, gaslight Girlboss geikie. That's what the government is doing.

Bethany: Gaslight Girlboss gatekeeper government.

Zoe: So I just finished watching the most recent season of American Horror Story. And if you know me, I fucking love American Horror Story. Even in the bad seasons, where I don't like it. I still love it. It's like one of the only series that I've actually watched start to finish. I think they do a really good job. And yeah, so if you haven't watched it, and you don't want it to be spoiled, mute me for like, a couple minutes.

London: I don't want it to be spoiled. One did leave for a second in the chat when you're done because, okay, I need to watch.

Zoe: Okay, we'll do that. We'll do that. So they get into aliens. And it's really interesting. So like, it's like this group of people who like they end up going and like, they get abducted, whatever. But like, it plays out where it's like half in the future and then half in the past. But like, they bring people into like this airbase, and like they don't age, but they're like, basically, like, just at the whim of these aliens. But it's like I don't remember who the President was during the whole Roswell situation. But they like, basically kind of act that all out of like, if that had happened, like what the President's response would be. And like, how he was just like, a certain amount of people are sacrificed every single year, but like it so that we can have the best technology. And it's like, I don't know, it gets into the whole idea of like, we give them a little bit of whatever, which is our humans, and then we get their technology because they have such advanced technology and like he likes walks in. And it's obviously like the 60s Any like set something on the table, opens it up like a briefcase, and it's like an iPod and he's like, one day, if you choose to work with us, you will have access to this and it is, you know, a thing that you can carry in your pocket and it has all of the songs in it that you would ever want to listen to. And I just think that's really interesting because I think it kind of toyed with the idea of like science fiction, you know, you get abducted but you live forever, but then you're like the breeding thing. They end up creating the perfect human alien-like specimen. The whole thing is just like a breeding scheme. Because they're like, well, we want to take over your earth, like you're already killing it. And like, we just want this extra space. And so they create, like the perfect beam to outlast the earth. And I think that's really cool. I don't really know how that ties in. But I just thought they did like a, like a decent depiction of it, where it was, like, still pretty crazy, but like crazy in a sense of like, I feel like that's not terribly far fetched. Like, I think that definitely could happen. You know, where, like, if the government was like, oh, yeah, we'll take the technology for a small price. 

Bethany: Yeah, I feel like if that could happen, the government would do it.

Zoe: Oh, yeah, absolutely. Absolutely. And like, the alien is like, well, we could just go to like the Soviet Union. If you don't want to pay attention to us. Whoever the President was, at the time was like, wait, wait, wait, don't do that. Don't do that. Hold on, we got to win the space race. And I just I think that's really funny, too, because they chose us and then it's just no, we're gonna take you down. Like, I don't think you understand that. I think if anything, if that was going to happen, I feel like that's like a decently realistic part of it, like, we want the technology we want to go to the moon. There's like a part of the compound that was like the moon landing. has all of the film equipment and it's still good. I think it's funny. I do think that the moon landing was like a legit thing, though.

Bethany: Oh, my God. 

Zoe: Oh, wait, hold on. I'm gonna tell London come back

Bethany: I was at work the other day and I had a teacher straight up tell students that she didn't think that the moon landing was real, They're like these are the people teaching the youth of tomorrow.

Zoe: Crazy, I was like we're talking about the moon landing. It's like do I think that could have faked it? Yeah, I think we definitely could have faked it, but like, I feel like we would have been outed a lot sooner. You know what I mean?

London: I don't know. I felt like we could have faked it and we still wouldn't be outed because the government's gonna just be like, if we ignore it, people will think they're crazy. 

Zoe: Yeah, fair enough.

London: But it would be nice if we didn't make it. I don't know. Yeah. Because it'd be cool to have someone go to the moon. I don't know. 

Zoe: Yeah It'd be cool if we did it. From like, a lens of like, yeah, that was pretty cool. But like we basically only went to the moon because we were beefing with the Soviet Union. Like that's pretty much it.

Bethany: That's why I think we did go. That's the proof that the moon landing wasn't faked because of the American ego it was our Dick measuring contest.

London: We got up there. They just placed like they wouldn't be put to the moon flag.

Bethany: If they faked it, they would have made it more dramatic there would have been like, and then America had to save the day from fucking bags or some shit. Proving that we're the best.

London: Yes, absolutely believe it's real. Bethany just convinced me.

Bethany: Anything to make America look like the hero. Not only did we win the pissing contest with the Soviets, we saved the best we saved y'all f!@$@.

Zoe: Literally cried. Okay, do we want to get into crazy alien stories? 

Bethany: So Maritza sent us this one. About You know, it's a small town in Japan a little bit outside of Fukushima. This little town of like 1900 people is full of abandoned roads and empty houses, and like really deserted, but there's like statues of aliens all across the town. The mascot is a small white alien piloting a flying saucer.

Zoe: Sounds like a colonist.

Bethany: One of its most famous dishes is ramen served in a bowl made of stone rumen to attract extraterrestrial visitors. I need it. So Kinoshita was a hiking mountain and a Fukushima Prefecture with four friends. Suddenly, a saucer-like shape appeared in front of them. This thing stuck out in front of me starting and stopping in the blue sky. Then all of a sudden it was gone. September 2020, Japan watched protocols to analyze aerial phenomenon occurring he knows alien believers to open in June the country's first ever lab aiming to observe UFOs now key researcher at emo's UFO lab, Kinoshita, I'm so sorry for everyone who actually knows how to pronounce, pronounce these words and hear me say the wrong. Um, Kinoshita believes aliens tried to make contact with him to let him know they exist. And we're here on the other side of the distance guy, I think they just wanted us to know that. 

Zoe: like in this kind of swings into, like pop culture, which we'll get into next, but like, it's very interesting that they all kind of seem to follow like the same not like style, like they're all in flying saucers like, they all kind of look similar, whatever, I think it's really interesting, especially at a time where, like, obviously, the ended up was not around. And so like cross communication, of like, sharing these stories and like, you know, like things are not probably translated as well as like, just like a click of a button. And so I think having things that are literally across the globe from one another, and having similarities, I think says a lot. Now that I'm saying that, like every single alien that ever exists, is definitely like a flying saucer, and like a little gray dude, big eyes, but I think it's really interesting.

Bethany;There's actually a support group. For people who've been abducted by aliens or have had alien encounters, that's actually really good. They're called Starborn. I've heard of those. This article from ABC says, the support group is like 1500 people, and like New England's and they host like secret meetings, although as secret as you can be with only 1500 people you know, and this article talks up to these twin sisters named Audrey and Debbie, who are members of the support group, they started having interactions with aliens as young as five years old. So they are a part of this Alien Encounter group. One of the twins, Audrey said, I was probably about five years old or so and a bright blue light would come into the room and the door would open and there would be a foggy kind of Misty blue light just shining through the whole house. And these two figures would come in and there would be a tall one and they had black capes, and they were bald and had big eyes. So what have been the same type, because UFO specialists categorize them. So in that last story we told the biracial couple from the 60s and in the story with the twins, they were both abducted by aliens referred to as the greys by UFO like experts. What I thought was interesting here experimentally wise, because I was trying to think why would aliens want to abduct these people? While I'm thinking the last guy with his 140 IQ, they might have been interested in that. And these guys were twins, and you always do experiments on twins. Because you need a control group.

Zoe: And that's really interesting.

Bethany: But pretty much the stories are all the same. That was something I didn't expect when looking at crazy stories, as almost all the articles say the exact same thing.

London: And that can't be a coincidence. 

Zoe: Maybe it also makes me think to have like them are we really the odd ones out? Like why do we look like those? 

Bethany: Well, I think it's like all these aliens look the same. I think it's like the same guy fucking with us. You know? 

Zoe: It's like the alien teenagers just coming to fuck with the whole planet.

Bethany: Well, no, like, if you're a scientist, you gotta go back and do research, you know, perform further studies. They probably think of us like fucking monkeys in a puddle or some shit.

Zoe: Not simply monkeys in a puddle. 

Bethany:  There right, right. They're there. They're correct. But you know, they don't even probably think we're worth like a shit like, you know, we don't even get consent or anything. They're like, Oh, little humans.

Zoe: All the intelligent aliens are just like, dude, they're literally destroying their planet. And they're all stupid.

London: like an anthill or something like that.

Bethany: We are no, not an anthill. Because they'll drown the anthill. I want them to be like, Oh, poor little monkeys. Would you like a banana? Would you like us to save your little planet?

London: They were more than they hoped they probably just wanted to step on that.

Bethany: I know. But like, Wouldn't it be grand if like a little alien civilization was just like, I'll take care of you little people. Y'all are fucking this up.

London: We can be their pets that dream domesticate us

Bethany: Exactly. Domesticated. Oh my god. I would like freedom. So other than that, I can negotiate.

London: Like right now we're like the wild and they just take us and they're like, no, no, here's how you do it.

Zoe: If I can be domesticated like a cat, just sit in a warm space and nap, I'll be good. And also, I feel like that comes without capitalism. 

London : Tell us what to do. 

Bethany: I want to be like, hey, there's no capitalism, right? And I want them to be like, what? What's what exactly?

Zoe: It's like, how do I pay you in there? Like pay?

London: Please take me with you. If I see capitalism, and they say what I'm going on a ship with, I'm like, Please do not put me back. Please, I promise you can do whatever. Actually. You can do whatever experiments you want. I was gonna say no, but then I thought about capitalism. And I was like, You know what, go ahead.

Zoe: So long term trauma of capitalism. I feel like is not as bad as anything breeding fucking experiments. No, I don't. I have very alien babies.

London: I don't know about all that. We're just dramatic. Privileged bitches this fine ignore us.

Zoe: This is true.

Bethany: Yeah, ignore them. I want my freedom. Please don't. I want to say about these girls, these twins, unlike the couple where they were in their car when it happened, and suddenly they're home and two hours are on these guys. They're always in bed when it happens. So that one kind of makes me feel like okay, that one could be like night terrors.

London: Or their sleep paralysis demon.

Bethany: Yeah, can be awful. Well, a lot of these ones say sleep paralysis. And but I could see that like, I could see it being sleep paralysis, like in some of their encounters sounds a little more like, I don't know. So I'm like, I could see how it was like a dream. Oh, and apparently the extraterrestrials can also embody your fears.

London: It'd be like capitalism. We love it.

Bethany: I know. I'm glad I was saying I don't want to be fucking subjugated. Now, they're gonna come for you now that you guys said that. And now you know, they're gonna be your fears. So you're gonna go be subjugated by capitalism on some other alien planet.

Zoe: Dammit. I want to get into like the pop culture of all this too, because I feel like there's when all of the similarities I think it's like, as we kind of got into earlier like that initial like, first contact, I guess we could say like, first at least like public case of someone like being in contact with aliens. It gives away so much to pop culture and like, what we like to attribute these beings with and all of that, and I think that's really interesting. But also the ways in which we kind of toyed around with those idea, like, I think of men and black. And like, how it's like, aliens, but it's like not but it's like believable, but it's like playing on like other conspiracies about like, fucking like, what, like lizard people and like, I don't know, not, I guess technically lizard people, but like, in that same era of conspiracies, and I think that's really interesting. Like, you have like, you're just typical, like, like, I think of like, ET, and arguably alien, but like, I don't know, aliens got kind of weird.

Bethany: I feel like what's kind of funny to me about men and black so much is that there's so much bureaucracy to it. And I'm like, isn't that what we would do? The second we made contact with anyone anytime they made it onto our planet, like here, so you have to file this paperwork. And you're like, I don't even speak English. I don't even have arms. And they're like, We're sorry. 

Zoe:This literally, it's like, so yeah, you work with us now?

Bethany: Yeah, like it would be like all the bureaucracy all every time they have a scene where it's like a million people just waiting in line. Anytime there's just waiting in line for things like it's the fucking DMV. I'm like, that's real right there. That's exactly how it would be. 

Zoe: It's like you just get in and then like, this receptionist was like, right down this hall, please. And it's like photos, identification fingerprints. It's like okay, how fun thank you so much.

Bethany: Fingerprints. How do you take fingerprints if they don't have fingers?

London:Though they'll do it we'll figure it out. I'm like, the whole thing of arriving and filling out paperwork. I think that's kind of how it's depicted a little bit on Rick and Morty too. I hope I'm remembering that right? Because there's an episode where Morty Yeah, he's going from one planet to another or different universe, and he has to show something up his butt to get past security. That's such an interesting concept of like, coming to going to a different planet and you're like, forced to go through like airport security is like what the fuck is this?

Zoe: It's like, what are you, what can you even check for?

Bethany: Oh my gosh, um, or like, you know how they have like Alien government and like Lilo and Stitch. And then they have like two that they like never to go into. Like he's like a social worker here for a foster kid but also I work with aliens. And no, I'm never going to explain that.

Zoe: Also, Lilo and Stitch probably had the most creative aliens. You know?

Bethany: Oh my god, Lilo and Stitch is iconic. Okay, iconic alien content right there.

London: It was me when I saw it on this list I was like, I completely forgot that like that was alien content because it's, kind of like it puts its own little spin on it and it's really cute, but I'm like, I forgot that stitch was even an alien.

Bethany: Right? Like I wasn't. I wasn't even thinking about them as aliens either. I had that same response. So I was just like.

London: Yeah, I feel like it's probably because it's like a kids show. So they make it look real cute, but I think it's cute how they did that.

Zoe: Even just like the ways that they went about it, like, fucking like Pleakley in Jumba. Like, there's just such a weird thing, the dynamic between both of them. Cobra bubbles.

Bethany: He went to the dark side so fast. He was like on the right side for so long. Well, alien man. And then as soon as, That bitch turned on him. I was like, Damn, he was doing his job. Holy shit. Like No wonder he turns bad. Yeah, so another one we have on the list is Mars Attacks. Have you guys seen that one?

London:  No.

Zoe: I've only seen pieces of it like I know, like the main character with chicken brain

Bethany: So like I watched it because it was on my Netflix like recommended. And let me tell you a weird ass movie with an insane cast. So Jack Black is like nobody in this movie. He's like 20 and he says like two lines and leaves. And I was like, Wait, that's Jack Black. And then he dies. He gets evaporated by aliens pretty fast. Because he's like a soldier type and then they just start killing people left and right. And then like, it's like this whole weird metaphor because the Martians keep on attacking and killing people. But the government keeps on trying to be friends with them anyway. And every time they try to make peace, the Martians like to attack more and more and more. And it's like I don't. I don't quite know what they were trying to say. Honestly. Like, I sat there and tried to think of what the political message was Americans like wasn't blowing things up more.

Zoe:  Can I just read through this list of people who are in Mars Attacks? Yes, some of them like the bigger names because I did not realize how many famous people are in this. So we have Jack Nicholson, Jack Black. Natalie Portman, Pierce Bronson, Danny DeVito. Sarah Jessica Parker. Christina Applegate, fucking Ray J, isn't it? Jim Brown is in it. Tom Jones. And the list continues. 

London: what is that? I've never heard of this. I'm watching this immediately after this. Because I just Googled it. And the first thing I saw, like I need to watch this. This is insane. Is it good Bethany?

Bethany: :The opening credits roll up and it just looks like it's like one star after another. And then you're watching it and it was kind of mediocre.

Zoe: Okay, I'm just pasting some photos that I found from the internet chat. What the fuck is that?

Bethany: Dogs' situation. Yeah, that's super weird. Like, they cut her head off and put it on a Chihuahua.

Zoe: I feel like that's not too crazy. You know? 

Bethany: They have no motivation. They're just been crazy for the sake of being crazy.

Zoe: Yeah, fair enough. But like, if you were to, like show up to the planet, and I don't know if people do weird shit to like insects. So it's like, I don't think it's terribly crazy to be like, oh, you know? What? Can I please?

Bethany: I mean, I hate that. I'm the insect in this situation. I'll be real with you.

Zoe: Yeah, same I don't mind. 

London: I mean, I do mind. It's  like, I don't mind it for me personally, but for humans as a whole. I don't mind. Like, yeah, cut them up and see what happens. Personally, me.

Zoe :But in general, the other alien.

Bethany: The invasion movie we have is science.

London: I've seen a little bit of it, but not enough to have a good memory. I know that it's very uneventful. That's all I got.

Bethany: It is a little slow. It is a little chatty. There is a lot of long conversations.

Zoe: Oh so hold on. I think I actually might know this movie.

Bethany: It's got like Joaquin Phoenix.

Zoe: There's like an older Alien movie that I can think of it just says it's like very distinct, like basically like people and like a gas station and then like all of the lights dim, and then they're like, basically sucked up. Science is weird. tinfoil hats come from? Correct.

Bethany: I mean, I know they do tinfoil hats and signs. I don't know if it's where it comes from.But they do this for a second. But it's only for like a second because the dad's like, you're being stupid. So they don't like wearing tinfoil hats. But pretty much these aliens are coming and I don't understand why they're coming to invade Earth or to steal people for an experiment. Because I think they end up just snatching a few people and leaving and then water hurts them. Our world is like 70% water and it rains here. 

London: Why would they come here? Why?

Bethany: Why would you be here? Why would they be interested in this land that is deadly to them? Like what is that purpose?

Zoe: Have they seen water before? Because that's one of my interests, one of the things that we think of like with life and it's because of how our life came to be is water. 

Bethany: I guess you know, we're not hadn't seen water before. 

Zoe: Yeah, like and if we you know, if there's no water anywhere else, we're like, oh, that thing can't survive.

Bethany:  Okay, aliens I apologize.

London: I was thinking that maybe they had done research before but then I'm just assuming from like, again, our perspective, like if we were going to make contact with someone else, hopefully, we had done enough to get there. We probably had to do research but so they might not know what water is. You're right, because it's like the whole thing of we went somewhere else and we came in contact with something we've never seen before. And it killed us because everything called humans were a little bit literally.

Bethany: You don't know that everything. The whole kill happy thing might be a human trait. Or on the other hand we might be the hardcore ones you don't know they might be like, Wait, it rains on this planet. 

Zoe: It can't exist in space without big suits.

Bethany: Then there's also times where like, people will have kind of a stupid is not to disrespect their death or anything. But sometimes people die and it's very silly.

Bethany: Okay, but on the other end of that sometimes people survive crazy as shit. Okay, people survive some crazy shit sometimes. You know, but if we're if we're talking about these aliens, where water hurts them, like humans will look hardcore as fuck, they're like, Wait, so you just like, you take like baths and stuff. Like you like submerging yourself and like the burning fire acid. Like what's wrong with you? You know, the nitrogen and oxygen? And we're like, yeah, we're like, yeah, we have to drink it or otherwise we microdose water like, you drink the lava. You drink the lava? I'm like, yeah, we can get it sparkling. Like there's bubbles in it.

Zoe: They contain spark. I don't know why that's so funny to me. Honestly. Yeah, I feel like it is very relative. Like you can't. Because it's like, we can't, you know, go walk in fire. But like, someone could be like, I live in fire.

Bethany: And then they'd be confused. They'd be like, Wait, you can't just breathe in the open vacuum of space. Like oh, like really?

London: Emitted? You went? Breathe. Just breathe. And that is why Lilo and Stitch routines. One of the top ones. Um, although I will say like the pop culture part of aliens. Like I feel like movies have done a good job kind of branching out and experimenting with some of those ideas of like, what happens if aliens can't touch water? What happens if they are weirdo people who like the government have metal black? What if? What if they are just simply lost? Like e t, which is such a cute movie and I cry every time at the end? Um, but I feel like in terms of like, the pop culture of it all like I think of like Roswell. And I've never haven't really heard of it like the Japanese time that we talked about, but it sounds like they've got pretty much the same little dude. It seems like they're tied to I guess, like the classic alien. You know, like, there's not really a ton of like, branching out with that.Yeah, and I felt like that, that reminded me that At what makes like in a movie an alien movie because I was thinking of like other movies that have like creatures that aren't that are kind of like, not supernatural, but like I was thinking of like, the mist. I don't know if there's a series but it's a good one. I like the movie like, is that considered like an alien thing? Or is that a monster thing? I was just thinking like what other monsters that aren't from because it also makes me think of like the quiet place in like, are those aliens? Or are these just like different monsters?

Bethany:  I think it's just an alien horror. Because I think if it comes from space, it's still an alien towards a monster. It's just like an alien monster. Yes. Because a quiet place is still alien, because I think of it like Alien. Yeah, aliens. Aliens, but it's a horror. Yeah. 

London: They're just kind of weird. 

Bethany: In a quiet place it was so good. 

London: That was so good I cried.

Zoe: I was so I think that's also like, they have enough realism in it, where it's like, and we kind of talked about this earlier with like, the ages thing of like, it's believable when you have a certain element of realism. But I also think that realism ties into the fact of like, when you kind of poke fun at the people who are in charge, there's much to be said about, like, the trustworthiness of that. Does that make sense? Yeah. Like if you know, like, in the show in the movie, and whatever, if you can be like, yeah, the government is kind of fucking weird. And anyways, here's what happens when the government doesn't respond properly. I think it just makes for a good movie that is, or at least gets like I shouldn't say like, more credible, but like, you know, you can be like, oh, yeah, actually, that's right. Whereas, you know, if it was like a film, or like, the government is like, totally like, Yeah, we're gonna protect you and like, everything will be great. And like, we're going to tell you everything that happens every step of the way. And obviously, things always go wrong, you know so.

Bethany: Well, we can get into real life stuff because we got some real government conspiracies to cover too, like Roswell, New Mexico, for those who don't know, had a quote unquote, weather balloon crash on July 7 1947. And it was officially announced on June 24 1997, US Air officials released a 231 page report dismissing long standing claims of an alien spacecraft crash in Roswell. So even though the crash was back in 1947, it took them until 1997. To tell us it was a weather balloon.

Bethany:Yeah, I'm like, That's sketchy. I feel like it was a weather balloon, you probably should have figured that out.

Zoe: Yeah. And then just going back to the whole, like, the, you know, of the US really wanted to do anything, you just ignore it. You know? So like, why did they feel like in 1997, they had to go back and correct.

Bethany: Yeah, like, why was it even relevant anymore? I feel like you could have said nothing, and no one would have even cared. They got caught up unless they were trying to draw your attention away from something else. They're like, let's hype up Roswell. So that way, they don't pay attention to this Real UFO crash happening over here right now. 

Zoe: Yeah, well, and also, I just think of the fact of how long you spend in the workforce. This is also a point in time where like, people were like retiring, like, you could retire. But like, if you started in 47, you were probably retired by the time it was 97. You know, so we just like, this is like a completely new group of people with completely different lives, hopefully at least completely different values. And like, I mean, granted, it is like, Army, but you know, different wars. And they still wanted, like someone sat down to create a 231 page report summing up that this is a weather balloon. It's a weather balloon. Yeah, like that. Just there's way too much effort and time and years put into that. No, I do think that the government, specifically the army, would be stupid enough to be like, Yeah, let's do this. But it's just suspicious.

London: It is suspicious. I agree. I don't know. It was weird. The government, the weirdos I don't know. 

Bethany: Who knows why they do anything. Do you guys want to check out the US Government UFO map? Yeah. Sounds fun. The bottom of our outline history.com from History Channel has a map of UFO sightings taken seriously by the US government. So these are also considered legitimate ones between 1947 and 1969 At the height of the Cold War, and more than 12,000 UFO sightings were reported to project Bluebook, a top secret Air Force team. Their mission was to scientifically investigate the incidents and determine whether any posed a national security threat. And here are some of the most fascinating cases along with other seminal UFO sightings. So let me see what's closest to me in my house.

Zoe: Say there are a lot of London where do you live again? Baltimore? Maryland, okay.Yes, it does have a state.

Bethany:Oh my gosh, this isn't even that far from me. The one closest to me was in Mount Palomar, California in 1952. It was a man named Georgia. It didn't add him at Adams ski. In the late 1940s, he became famous for his flying saucer photos. He later claimed to have communicated with the visitor from Venus using a combination of hand gestures and mental telepathy. He particularly admired the creature's baby soft flesh and glistening hair.

London: There was a sighting at the White House.

Bethany: Oh my god

London:  Air traffic controller at the National Airport joked about the radar blips being flying saucers. But after colleagues saw them to an after the lights buzz, the Capitol and White House fighter jets were deployed as new pay as newspaper headlines scream to saucers swarm over Capitol, the Air Force blamed a temperature inversion.

Bethany: But why would that make flying saucers on your radar?

Zoe: My first thought would be like, Oh my God, there's gonna be a tornado.

Bethany: Yeah, right.

London: I felt like, Oh, no.

Zoe: Was it taken seriously just because it was in Washington DC. That was my question.

London: Because who were these workers? 

Bethany: Or if it wasn't UFOs, it was probably something and they didn't want to admit it.

London: Well, it said one person joked about it. And then everybody else was like, Oh, we see it too.

Zoe: So there's not really any in Iowa, which, you know, I don't blame them, although we do have the most corn. So I like following the idea of a crop circle.

Bethany: We have. Now there's more interesting corn crops. I love how that's relevant. And I was like that one in Illinois, huh? 

Zoe: Yeah,basically, there's one over Lake Superior. This one is about how an Air Force jet was chasing a UFO over Lake Superior in a restricted airspace, which is interesting. And it just vanished right in front of the person's eyes. There was never a record that was found; they could never figure out why. Like it was on their radars. They had it and then it was gone, which I think is very interesting.

London: That alien did not want to mess with me. Gotta get out of there.

Zoe: And that was 1953 I don't blame them. They foresaw paperwork and had to go.

London:I didn't have time, they had something illegal. We're not trying to get up there. We're not trying to get caught by spaceways authorities. Well, I hope that they're doing good in their little aircraft.

Zoe: And then again, it's one of those things where it was like it's on a radar and then it disappears. And they like, I guess according to this map, like took it seriously.

London: I think because you know how when they talk about this kind of sciency stuff, because they never know what's going on. But they're always talking about how things just get picked up. And they think it's something and it's not. I just think like what's taken? How do you take it seriously and how do you not like what's a saucer and what's not? Like? What's the distinction? 

Bethany:  It's like anything's a UFO, if you're bad enough at identifying things.

London: Yes, and I don't trust our government to do a very good job. Not to say you're not doing your jobs right, but you haven't been so they're not.

Bethany: I mean, yeah, to be saying that actually.

Zoe: There's one in New Mexico 1948 that our witnesses reported seeing green balls of fire in the sky as one of them raced head on towards a plane. The pilot had to swerve some explanation about Soviet spy devices, the nuclear Fallout debris or alternate forms of lighting. But somehow was part of this map like UFO sightings taken seriously. So that's just really interesting.

Bethany: That also sounds really weird. You're telling me some random Soviets in 1947 We're making green balls of fire to shoot, yeah literally.I'm like, I feel like they were pretending if they didn't make it to the moon first, and they got that kind of technologies like, this raises more questions.

London: What if the US government created some of these stories just to make them try to make people believe that they don't know that there's been, like, real contact? Because I don't know, some of this just feels weird because it's a lot of, oh, they witnessed it, but then it was gone. And it was US troops, or it was me because I read the White House One, two, and I was like, that was people at the White House. And you guys said you saw it? And then you were like, you didn't?

Bethany: Yeah, they're like doubting their own credibility. Like, come on, guys.

Zoe: If you see some green balls of fire in my backyard, no, you did not. So yeah, so interesting. Seeing all of these stories, it seems like these stories are slightly different from what we saw, like, and pop culture and what we saw and like the stories from people, so it just makes me think about how the government stories, should they be trusted? If they're different from people's stories? Should they be? I don't know if they only come from the military. And while we're actively beefing with other countries, does it give them any more credibility? I think no, but you can make your own decisions. With that being said, I think we have reached the end of our time. If you would like to go look and see if there are any UFO sightings near you. There will be the link to that in our show notes. So definitely check it out. It's kind of interesting. We'd love to hear your thoughts. And we will see you next time for another episode of Lemon OG, thanks for listening everyone.

Zoe: Bye

Bethany: Bye

London: Bye