Stop Identifying with Your Favourite Thing : Over-Identification is Harmful and Unproductive
Written By: Norlena Piseth | January 12, 2023
Humans are generally empathetic creatures. We are designed to understand each other in such a way that it can be difficult to resist being influenced by the people surrounding us. While this isn’t inherently bad — as some can change us for the better — it becomes so when we no longer remove ourselves from a situation we are not needed in. This applies to infatuations or even obsessions with media such as sports, celebrities, and fictional characters. Over-identifying is harmful to us and to those around us alike.
When we over-identify with something or someone, whatever happens becomes personal to us. The industry in which such identification is most prevalent would be the sports industry. In such competitive games, many fans tend to put their whole heart into a game and a point lost would be as if the opposing team shot a bullet through it. These fans see anyone who dare try to bring down their favourite team ( friend or foe ) as their mortal enemies, and therefore they see nothing wrong with treating these random strangers — who they have no personal relation to — as something less than them. One instance would be a fan throwing a water bottle at Kyrie Irving, who had left the Boston team for Brooklyn.
Unfortunately, the dangers don’t stop at throwing water bottles. These feelings have escalated to the point of riots, as demonstrated by fans when the Eagles won Super Bowl LII in 2018. Not only were multiple properties damaged in the “celebration,” it also sparked outrage against the police force in America who are notorious for resorting to violent action when it comes to riots — and even peaceful protests — organised by black people, who were surprisingly ( or unsurprisingly ) relatively docile in the face of such damage.
It’s evident how harmful over-identification can be, and most people who do it don’t realise the repercussions they could sustain or inflict on others. When this happens, it's important to practise awareness and mindfulness, so as to not let momentary emotions become permanent facts. To achieve mindfulness, the key is to be self-compassionate. Do not let negative emotions stew and become more than what they are. Instead of sitting on it, we should allow ourselves to feel these emotions and then let it go. Be mindful of how these feelings manifest, because when they are simply just “My friend didn’t text back today so I’m sad”, they can also become “Nobody wants to talk to me”, which is extremely detrimental in the long run.
Being able to see an emotion for what it is — a momentary feeling — is a necessary skill to ensure mental and emotional stability. Keeping calm and collected, especially when faced with normally stressful events, will help in navigating through life. It will allow the right thoughts and the best decisions to surface without any unnecessary baggage. Over-identification is not the right way to go about things, and should be kept at bay.
