If you’ve been on TikTok lately, you’ve probably seen mentions of something called the “Gen-Z stare,” a newer trend to join the recurring quarrels between Generation Z and Millennials on the social platform. In its entirety, the Gen-Z stare is defined as a Gen-Z’s habit of blankly staring at people when spoken to in particularly uncomfortable or unusual environments and/or situations, usually taking place in a customer service setting (for instance, at a coffee shop or a restaurant). However, depending on which generation you ask, the context of when the Gen-Z stare is used changes; with Gen-Zers citing the version where Gen-Z is the employee and Millennials citing the version where Gen-Z is the customer. While I’m certain there is legitimacy in both of these experiences, as a member of Gen-Z myself, I will primarily discuss the former, as I believe this perspective from Gen-Z sparks a deeper conversation about the difficulties of the inauthenticity of customer service jobs often worked by Gen-Z and the perpetuating cycle of unhealthy company-employee relationships. 

The (Draining) Reality of Working in Customer Service

In a society where you are told to be true to yourself, working in customer service can feel like the biggest lie in the world. The industry requires a lot of mental effort to play the role of a friendly, helpful member of staff, performing the emotions expected of you as a representative of the company. This can be especially taxing for members of Gen-Z, especially considering their strong values of authenticity in the brands or content they interact with, as this forced performance can feel like a betrayal of the identity they were raised upon. In fact, according to customer-service pro Vitaliy Verbenko, needing “to overcome the difference between emotions an employee is expected to display between emotions an employee actually feels,” conflicts with that very value and commodifies the employee’s emotions, setting them up as something to be bought or sold. For instance, think of a barista who smiles through an abusive interaction or apologizes for an inconvenience they didn’t even cause – these are not a reflection of the barista’s true feelings, but instead simply company policy. Even some fast-food chains, like Chick-fil-A, require an inflexible script to be followed by their employees with all customer interactions, sometimes with the threat of being written up if not followed. When placed altogether, it is no wonder that such jobs, which seem naturally dehumanizing through their emotional labor, can negatively affect and eventually burn out any employee, no less a younger one, resulting in that Gen-Z stare which can appear as an apathetic or detached expression. This stare is not often one of rudeness, but instead reflective of these very draining, inauthentic conditions, and worsened by poor company-employee relationships.  

The Role of the Company: Unhealthy Company-Employee Relationships

We understand now that the Gen-Z stare is less of an issue of the employees themselves, and more of an issue of companies commodifying their emotions while refusing accountability for the conditions that require it. This is not helped by the fact that company-employee relationships can already be naturally adversarial, which, when not actively considered, can further poor relations and damage the trust between a company and its employees. In fact, many of those who work in customer service, Gen-Z or otherwise, describe how it’s more often than not the company that makes-or-breaks their job, not the angry, potentially abusive customers (though, of course, they’re not preferred, either). For example, company management may instruct you to please customers to the best of your ability, yet simultaneously enforce strict rules that prevent you from doing so, all while leaving the blame on you for the outcome (with threats of being written up or even being fired). These sorts of situations are not so uncommon in customer service fields, so much so that company management as a whole has garnered a poor reputation for never having employees' backs, throwing them under the bus for the sake of the company’s reputation, even if an employee is not at fault. 

These situations are becoming more and more common, especially considering our technologically advancing world, which further increases customer convenience and sales, the brunt of which growth customer service employees are forced to bear. Even more so, these increases result in the company itself growing, making direct communication between an employee and company management more difficult. These evolving gaps of power further strain the already conflicted and distrustful relationship between employer and employee, fostering an environment that makes it easy for employees to be viewed simply as numbers rather than people. So, when faced with situations like this: angry customers, strict rules and policies, and low job security, what other response can you expect beyond the Gen-Z stare?

What Accountability, if Any, is to be Had?

While the Gen-Z stare is typically understood as a result of the crossroads of uncomfortable customer interactions, high emotional labor, and company threats, we must consider the scenario when Gen-Z is the customer. Many millennials claim this is a common occurrence; for instance, a waiter receiving the Gen-Z stare after simply asking what they would like to drink. While in this case, the Gen-Zer is not an employee with the stress of a company and customer expectations hanging over their head, situations like this still do not eliminate my claims that such interactions can feel like an uncomfortable performance or lie to Gen-Z, even as the customer. For those seeking to be hyper-critical of this younger generation, it’s important to remember that Gen-Z encompasses everyone born between 1997 and 2012 (ages 13-28 as of 2025), with many having practiced socializing from behind a computer screen. In fact, I would not be surprised if many of these poor experiences describe members of Gen-Z who are still in high school, and are therefore still learning and experiencing the world. Now, an explanation does not mean an excuse, as there is some accountability to be had on the part of Gen-Z on working towards improving these skills. But, a part does not equal a whole, and I do believe it to be a natural course of time for this generation, just as the generations before, to learn and grow in these abilities. 

Overall, understanding the performance of customer service jobs, as a customer, an employee, or even the company, is key to understanding that the person on the other side of the interaction truly is just that: another person. In an environment that encourages this dehumanization and allows for abuse from customer or company, it is no wonder that the Gen-Z stare has become such a popular trend on TikTok, and is indicative of all the ways companies, big and small, need to prioritize and value their workers to improve the experience for everyone.